Wife feeling the hurt from a cheating husband and contemplating divorce

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Hi Gilbert

I just learned husband was having affair since September 2016.

He now wants a second chance but will not do any of the things I have asked him to do. Like counselling, anger management course and giving me access to his phone and PC. I have lost all trust in him. And do not trust him anymore.

I cannot stop thinking of the images of the two of them. The scheming. The lies. The way he treated me.

I’m totally devastated. My colleagues and family have been supportive. I know the decision lies with me.

It’s so hard to deal with the pain.



  1. well, Vivian everyone does make mistake however I can understand how U feel as I’m a woman too.
    If you have kids , need to think of their future , emotion .Probably he already realized his mistake and making a changes to make things right, at the same U also need to check if in any cause that U has lead to the affair. Im not siding anyone but need to be fair. if cry when thinking about it means U still loves him.
    If U really love him, plse give a 2nd chances as everyone deserve it.
    My 1cent opinion.

  2. Hi,

    I just learned about my husband affair a year ago. I was devasted as I love him very much and still is. After talking out with him, he hope I could accommodate to him having another love. I was at a lost but finally agreed. From that day onwards, I have been feeling down and cry myself to sleep every now and then. Recently, I just found out that he was overseas with his lover when I confronted him, I did not give him a chance to explain further as I couldn’t bear the thoughts of them being together. I guess the problem lies with me cause I know i told him I could accommodate but I just cannot bring myself to accept the fact that he loves another woman. These days is a torture, I just keep crying and crying and am at a lost now. Please give me some advice.

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