Men more likely to commit suicide after divorce, study finds (CNN.com)

Number of View: 1483     By Sarah Yang (WebMD) — Men seeking a good reason to salvage their marriages may want to consider this: A new study finds that divorced and separated men are two and a half times more likely to commit suicide than married men. Divorce, however, doesn’t seem to lead more women to commit suicide — a surprising finding considering the popular wisdom that women suffer more than men after a divorce, according to the study, published this week in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health. “We now need to look at the possibility that divorce negatively affects men, too,” said study author Augustine Kposowa, Ph.D., an associate professor of sociology at the University of California at Riverside. Women are set back financially, he said, but “the man does not emerge unscathed.”   The difference, he theorized, lies in how men and women form social bonds. Men make friends with whom they can hang out, and women make friends with whom they can share their feelings. “Women are socialized to have more friends, deeper friendships, and so on. Men are socialized differently, to be macho, and do not have much deeper friendships. So when a …

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Divorce may hit men harder (The globe and mail)

Number of View: 921   Sarah Hampson From Wednesday’s Globe and Mail Published on Wednesday, May. 23, 2007 3:08AM EDT Last updated on Tuesday, Mar. 31, 2009 10:54PM EDT The image of men as suck-it-up survivors of emotional trauma just took another knock. A new Statistics Canada study on marital breakdown, released Tuesday, shows that men are more likely than women to suffer from depression in the two years following the end of a marriage or common-law relationship. The study, based on data from the National Population Health Survey (NPHS), which collects information about the health of Canadians, showed that while both men and women suffer a period of depression more often than people who remain with their spouses, men who have been divorced or separated fare worse than women in similar circumstances. Newly single men, aged 20 to 64, were six times more likely to report an episode of the blues than men who stayed married. By comparison, women who had undergone a marital breakdown were only 3.5 times more likely to report feelings of despair than their counterparts who remained in marriages. Interestingly, the study found that the breakup itself caused depression. Other factors often associated with the …

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When Divorce Isn’t the Only Choice (Newsweek 29 Mar)

Number of View: 177     When Divorce Isn’t the Only Choice A Montana writer’s husband said he was leaving, but she saw another way out. By Barbara Kantrowitz and Pat Wingert | Newsweek Web Exclusive  Mar 29, 2010  Her husband’s words hit Laura Munson “like a sucker punch.” And yet, she says, she was able to duck. After two decades together, he came to her on a summer day and told her: “I don’t love you anymore. I’m not sure I ever did. I’m moving out. The kids will understand. They’ll want me to be happy.” His plan was to leave Munson, their two young children, and the life they had built together in a farmhouse on 20 acres in rural Montana. What happened next? The usual script calls for battling divorce lawyers, years in court, and lingering anger for the rest of their lives. Instead, Munson kept telling her husband, “I don’t buy it.” She saw another reason for his despair: his work wasn’t going well, and he was miserable because of it. She knew he was worried that he wouldn’t be able to support their famil, and that was devastating to him. So she held her anger in …

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The impact of divorce on children (drheller.com)

Number of View: 385 The Impact of Divorce on Children For many years the prevailing view has been that divorce was not only traumatic for children but contributed to negative life outcomes for the majority of those whose parents divorced. Recently, however, in “For Better or for Worse: Divorce Reconsidered” by Hetherington and Kelly (2002), a new picture has emerged. The good news? 75% of the children of divorce did not end up having serious psychological, social, or academic problems. The bad news? 25% of the children from divorce did end up having such problems. It is immediately important to further clarify these percentages. Historically divorce research has been relatively short-term, generally exploring the first two years post-divorce, which is clearly the period of greatest upheaval and, therefore, the time when all parties, parents and children, look the worst. Hetherington, a research psychologist, not only has been following some families for 30 years but many for ten years or more. Also, where most research has just looked at divorced families, Hetherington compared divorced families to non-divorced families, providing much more refined data. This article will report on a number of her findings along with some of my own observations. The …

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Why Men Avoid Sex (Asiaone 24 Mar)

Number of View: 718 You want it, he doesn’t – what gives? by Madeline           So you’re the tiger in bed. You want it, but his libido has gone MIA. According to Martha Lee, clinical sexologist at Eros Coaching, “It’s normal for men to experience a loss of sexual desire in bouts. When that happens, a man has a harder time dealing with it as, in most cases, his sense of self is tied up with his virility.” This also means that he may be too ashamed to speak up or seek help. So it’s up to you to suss out his pleasure busters and experiment with a few tried-and-tested solutions. Why he’s avoiding sex: He may be super-stressed out If your hubby’s workplace is like that of the typical Singaporean male, he’s likely to be a bundle of overstretched nerves by the time he gets home at night. Daniel Koh, health psychologist at Insights Mind Centre, says that those who are stressed are often too preoccupied with worry to consider the possibility of pleasure. With his mind filled up with other thoughts, he may not even recognise the pleasure of sex, not to mention feel …

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15 Lies Men Tell Their Girlfriends (The Best Article)

Number of View: 290 15 Lies Men Tell Their Girlfriends Posted: 24 Mar 2010 03:18 PM PDT Written by Cowboy Men lie to women and women lie to men, but the opposing sexes go about these things in different ways. Women usually tend to lie in order to spare feelings and make people feel better — or to keep the peace. At the center of the male lie is, most commonly, either his ego or his unwillingness to cause drama, or to get in trouble — but both parties are almost always guilty of lying to conceal something. Consistent lying can tear two people apart, no matter the intention, so we’ve gathered 15 examples of lies men tell their girlfriends. Watch out for these, no matter which end of the lie you’re at. “I can fix it.” Image Source Let’s be honest: Men love to think they can fix anything. It’s practically programmed into their genetics. Even if they don’t know how to fix something, it’s very likely that they won’t admit to it, to save their ego. Remember to question whether or not he really can fix what he says he can, to avoid some ridiculous bathroom flooding disaster. …

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Recession, resilience, divorce? (familyinequality)

Number of View: 333 Recession, resilience, divorce?   December 18, 2009 by Philip Cohen Updated December 29, 2009.   Delivering some “good news for Christmas,” The National Marriage Project, under the editorship of the sociologist W. Bradford Wilcox, has released a report titled The State of Our Unions, 2009: Money and Marriage. It has a lot of useful information on marriage and families, with some editorial bending in the pro-marriage-and-family direction.   My beef here is with the chapter titled “The Great Recession’s Silver Lining?” In it, Wilcox writes:   judging by divorce trends, many couples appear to be developing a new appreciation for the economic and social support that marriage can provide in tough times. Thus, one piece of good news emerging from the last two years is that marital stability is up.   That line was quoted by Ross Douthat at the New York Times, which is a shame, because there is no evidence about anyone’s appreciation for marriage in the chapter. Instead, the evidence for this assertion is presented in a graph that shows three data points in the divorce-rate trend:   The figure shows a decline in the divorce rate from 2007 to 2008. In the press release …

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Sex Addiction in Women is a Reality (sexualaddictionrecovery.com)

Number of View: 313 Sex Addiction in Women is a Reality   Sex addiction in women is more common than we know. Here are a few frightening statistics on Women with Pornography Addiction: • 28% of those admitting to sexual addiction are women (internet-filter-review.com).   • 34% of women in one poll admitted to using Internet pornography and 1 out of every 6 women reported struggles with addiction to pornography (Today’s Christian Woman, Fall 2003). How many women share a similar struggle alone and simply won’t show up in these statistics and how many more women consider their behaviors “relationship or love obsessions” and not sex addictions? We believe that sex addiction in women is much more common!   The shame associated with sex addiction in women may be even greater than that felt by men – at least men are culturally validated for their “sexual appetites” while women are often just called names. The double standard keeps many women alone and afraid of discovery and filled with   Shame and Guilt   The female sex addict (much like the male) learns that she can either get high with sex (arousal), numb out or kill pain with sex (masturbating in …

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What about Fathers who can’t afford maintenance? (Today 22 Mar)

Number of View: 527 What about Fathers who can’t afford maintenance? 09:10 AM Mar 22, 2010 by Alicia Wong Does more need to be done for fathers, who for legitimate reasons, are unable to afford child maintenance?   Take Kenneth (not his real name) for example. The 40-year-old has been wheelchair-bound since he was injured in a car accident six months after he got married. Last September, he agreed to a divorce, and now has to pay $280 in child maintenance monthly.   While he was given a three-month reprieve after he lost his $5-an-hour job in December, Kenneth noted that his ex-wife earns more than $2,000 a month. “I’m not going to shirk my responsibility but you expect us to give 20, 30 per cent of our pay? We need money to survive too,” he said.   His wife and son, 12, still live in the matrimonial home as Kenneth agreed to let them live there for a year after the divorce. His job hunt has been futile, even after asking organisations, including the Handicaps Welfare Association, for help.   “Sometimes women might be the aggressors … If the Women’s Charter is now set stronger against us, what kind …

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Time to allow men to claim maintenance? (Today 22 Mar)

Number of View: 430 Time to allow men to claim? Opinions differ as to whether a woman should provide alimony to her ex-husband 09:10 AM Mar 22, 2010 by Alicia Wong SINGAPORE – With a recent tax revision recognising that women can be breadwinners, should a woman then provide alimony to her ex-husband under the appropriate circumstances? From next month, women who support their husbands will be allowed to claim tax relief. Previously, only husbands supporting their wives could do so. Lawyers MediaCorp spoke to said this signals a recognition that women do support their husbands, but were divided on whether this could, or should, lead to men being able to claim spousal maintenance. Family lawyer and women’s rights advocate Dr Anamah Tan said since the tax revision recognises that “it’s all right” for the wife to support her husband, “why not such a gender-equal attitude” to maintenance? Under the Women’s Charter, only women can claim spousal maintenance. But either parent who has care and control of a child can claim child maintenance. “It’s only fair” that house husbands get maintenance, Dr Tan said. Although not the majority, quite a number of women are earning more than men. More and …

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